One of the most common questions I receive is, “Why hasn’t my deceased loved one contacted me yet?” Other people experience some contact, but ask why there hasn’t been more. I understand the questions since there is still so much needless worry and fear associated with physical death.
(NOTE: I will not use the terms ‘departed, deceased, or dead’ since those have such strongly entrenched – and, according to much contemporary evidence – erroneous meanings about the end of life. Instead, I will use more accurate terms: changed worlds, passed on, physical or bodily death / die, orcrossed over. Other more factual descriptors for what happens after physical death include: transitioned / moved to the next phase of forever, reentered the field of all possibilities, dropped the body, andgraduated from earth-school.)
This conscious language can help you remember that life and love truly are forever.
Developing a new, although different, relationship with those who have dropped their bodies is less difficult than you might think. They are usually very motivated to establish contact. They have energy or astral bodies that are similar to their physical ones while on earth. They are much closer than we used to imagine.
Communicating with those who have crossed over is much like talking with family and friends who live in another country. You can’t see them but, nonetheless, you know they have a body and are alive. The main difference is that you hear the voices of those on earth with your ears. For those who have graduated from earth-school, you may hear them with your ears or telepathically – with ‘your mind’s ears.’
(The emerging SoulPhone spirit communication technology being developed at the Laboratory for Advancement in Consciousness and Health at the University of Arizona may soon change all that. To learn more, visit SoulPhone.org.)
The following keys can enhance your chances of having meaningful after-death communications(ADCs) and increase your certainty that you and your loved ones are integral and eternal parts of Life Itself.
- Learn the documented clinical, scientific, and empirical evidencethat physical death is not an end. This data clearly indicates that life continues after the body dies. Further, this evidence strongly indicates that you will see your transitioned loved ones when you pass on.Replicated, double-blind, peer-reviewed, journal-published, and statistically significant university studies leave little doubt. Bodily death is a new beginning into the next phase of life. This evidence – as summarized in my book Soul Proof and Greater Reality(coauthored with Gary Schwartz, PhD) – can decrease your fear, confusion, and other lower energy emotions about moving into the next phase of forever. And that, in turn, can help you deeply realize that life is never-ending. To learn more about this evidence, see Article #1 Scientific Evidence That Life Is Never Endingon the home page of com.
- Know that ADCs are real and very common. Even though your loved ones who have changed worlds will quite certainly greet you when you graduate from earth-school, you don’t have to wait until thento communicate with them. Just knowing that this is possible is the first step to establishing a real, although different, relationship with them. At least 25% of Americans have experienced one or more ADCs. That number swells to 66% for widows and widowers, and 75% for bereaved parents. So these contacts are not weird or kooky but, rather, very common. To learn more about ADCs, see Article #28: After Death Communications.I and eleven great minds about consciousness topics – Raymond Moody, Caroline Myss, Anita Moorjani, Gary Schwartz, and others – discuss contemporary understandings about this and other big questions about life in The Eleven Questions. Also featured in this book is my interview with Bill Guggenheim, co-author of Hello from Heaven, a pioneering book about ADCs.
- Ask for contact with them. Wise spiritual teachings have reminded us, “Ask and you shall receive.” So ask, intend, and pray for a sign. Don’t be timid. Invite them in by name. Talk to them aloud if possible; that let’s them know that you are taking this seriously and helps you stay focused. Just treat them like a real person since they are.Set a date and time for you to connect with them and keep the appointment. They have other things to do so set an appointment just as you would with someone on earth. Then start talking, even if you aren’t sure they are there yet. Their presence may seem to build over time as you sense the reality of a visit.
Then get into the zone and block out extraneous noises and thoughts. Talk about anything, just as you would do with a human friend or family member. Share personal events and ask them questions. Throughout the day, point out items of interest to them, for example, ‘Oh look, Dad, there’s the restaurant you loved so much.” There’s no elevator to success so, as with most things, practice makes perfect.
Wanting contact with your loved ones who have passed on isn’t sinful or evil.
Yes, I know . . . certain chapters of a book—that was written several thousand years ago and has been changed extensively—warned against consorting with spirits. But those same chapters said it was OK to make foreigners slaves for life. They also warned against the sin of cutting the hair a certain way, planting more than one type of seed in the same area, and going to temple when menstruating. That last one was a capital offense, by the way.
I take the warnings in those chapters seriously, but not literally. Those ancient teachings may have been given to protect people from malicious and capricious spirits. Just as on earth, some beings in other realms are imbalanced and thus mistreat and take advantage of others. It’s wise to shield yourself with a prayer and intention that only good and God, love and light will result from your spiritual explorations.
In my opinion, caution about engaging with lower energy – some call them evil – spirits is warranted. But the average person doesn’t have to worry about them when following the recommendations in this article. It can be a different story for humans who abuse alcohol and / or drugs, worship evil, and call in dark spirits.
- Upgrade your consciousness to higher and finer levels. To best enjoy contact with your loved ones who have transitioned to the next phase of forever, get on a similar wavelength as they are enjoying. How? Meditate, spend time in nature, pray, serve others, and express gratitude. Focus on the positives in your life, optimally care for your body/mind, and fine-tune your body/mind as explained in my book Radiant Wellness.Doing this regularly helps your energy be more on the same page, so to speak, as those you are hoping to contact. You can’t communicate with them via station 101.5 FM—that broadcasts peaceful and loving programming —if you’re tuned in to station 0.1 FM that focuses on negativity, fear, and resentment. Make sense?
- Be aware of subtle communications. You will probably be disappointed if you absolutely must have a solid and extended contact from loved ones who have reentered the field of all possibilities. Realize that their contacts may be more ethereal or fleeting than you expect. Be grateful for contacts such electronic aberrations, lucid dreams, and mysterious occurrences.To facilitate better contacts, feel excited about initial gauzy and temporary apparitions, meaningful coincidences, and telepathic communications. It’s already been 99.9% scientifically proven that afterlife exists so relax and release any fears about that. Enjoy your contacts and know they are often not just your imagination or wishful thinking.
- Talk to them as if they are presentsince they probably are. Your loved ones who have crossed over are not a zillion quadrillion miles away up in the sky somewhere. That’s a Middle Age or even earlier mistaken concept. They are likely very near, especially when you think of them, ask for a visit, or feel their presence ‘out of the blue.’Continue your relationship by talking to them aloud or in your heart and mind. Then listen for subtle responses. Remember that many ADCs have been authenticated so this is not crazy. Sensing their presence by sight, feeling, smell, and sound helps you remember that everything about them—except for their no longer needed physical shell—is very much alive and well.
- Release the pressure. It may not be easy to communicate from one dimension to another. Can you instantly and clearly contact those in other realms? I can’t. So don’t put pressure on yourself or them about it. Worry and fear are lower energy emotions so avoid those. Instead, replace those emotions with gratitude, positive expectancy, and enthusiasm.Don’t become upset if your initial efforts aren’t fruitful. That will just create additional pressure and decrease the chance of a successful contact. As in many pursuits, relaxation and clear focus assists success. Meditation, prayer, and slow deep breaths usually do the trick.
- Hold an object of theirs. Some psychics and mediums encourage their clients to bring a personal item that belonged to the person in spirit they wish to reach. This makes sense since objects can absorb and retain energy. Holding an object of your loved one who has changed worlds—in conjunction with the other steps—is another way to enhance connection with them.
- Give thankswhen any kind of communication happens so it’s more likely to happen again. Gratitude is one of the highest energy emotions that—along with love—is said to be closest to the energy of Source / God. Focus on the glass being half full and have appreciation for even fleeting or minor contact.
- Leave room for the “X” factor. The universe is indescribably vast and magnificent.Your five senses perceive much less than 1% of reality so realize there is much that you cannot perceive or even imagine. There’s much we humans still don’t know about every aspect of life including the phase after bodily death. And, besides, who doesn’t like a great mystery?For example, contact from your loved ones who graduated from earth-school may be delayed for good reasons that you can’t understand. Maybe they are still recharging, healing, or getting reoriented to spirit side. Perhaps they are very busy with other tasks and know that you understand love and life are eternal.They might know that you are doing OK after their earlier visits. Finally, it could be part of your soul’s plan to become more independent, thus the absence or lack of visits. Don’t get too obsessive about it and do trust the power of love and Universe / Life / Creator.
- Use the Facilitated After-Death Contact technique.I’ve created a special way to help you enjoy visits with loved ones who have crossed over. Deep relaxation / hypnosis helps you become more calm and clear. I use some of the strategies in this article to create a holistic experience that can enhance your perception of loved ones whose body died. For optimal results, do this session in a quiet setting where you won’t be disturbed. Feel free to share it with close family and friends and, if desired, discuss your experiences afterwards. To order, Facilitated After-Death Contact.
- Join the SoulPhone® and Greater Reality Living Community. Exciting new technological advances are underway at the University of Arizona’s Laboratory for Advances in Consciousness and Health directed by Gary E. Schwartz, PhD. The goal is to provide reliable communication with loved ones and luminaries from every field of study who have passed on and want to continue contact.The first step is completion of a SoulSwitch® that non-physical beings can manipulate to give yes / no replies. The next device will be an array of these switches to create a SoulKeyboard® that will enable texting and typing messages. After that, SoulAudio® is envisioned to allow audio contact – much like talking by phone now – with those in the next phase of forever. After that, SoulVideo® will hopefully enable visits as currently used via FaceTime, Skype, or Zoom.The ultimate goal is to create an app to be used on your smart phone that connects to one or more central SoulStudios®.As of May 2018, Dr. Schwartz estimates a 99% probability that the SoulSwitchdevice will be completed by autumn of this year. The SoulKeyboardshould be ready within one year after that.This research requires ultrasensitive, digital equipment, and an expert staff of engineers optical physicists, and software specialists. To learn more, visit org.
Much evidence indicates that your dear ones who have changed worlds are, or – depending on circumstances at the time of physical death, soon will be – very happy, peaceful, and enthusiastic right now. They want you to be the same as well. When? You guessed it . . . right now.
Note: Special thanks to Rhonda Eklund Schwartz, BFA, MFA, for permission to share information from her book and presentation at the Academy for Spiritual and Consciousness Studies symposium in 2017. Rhonda is a selective research medium at the Laboratory for Advancement in Consciousness and Healthand author of Love Eternal: Breakthrough Personal and Scientific Evidence for Life After Death.
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Thank you for sharing this article with others who can use it. I hope that this article – and taking the action steps discussed – help you feel more happy, healthy, peaceful, clear, and energetic. You deserve to feel that way and the world needs your greatest gifts.
Life and love are forever. Shall we live accordingly?
Mark Pitstick, MA, DC is an author, master’s clinical psychologist, holistic chiropractic physician, frequent media guest, and workshop facilitator. He is director of The Soul Phone Foundation, co–founder of Greater Reality Living Groups,and board member of Helping Parents Heal. Dr. Pitstick can help you know and show– no matter what is going on around you – that your earthly experience is a totally safe, meaningful, and magnificent adventure amidst forever. Visit About Dr. Mark Pitstickfor his full bio.
Note: Because of his many outreaches, Dr. Pitstick can no longer answer complex and multiple questions from individuals. However, he has created many resources to answer your biggest questions and provide holistic solutions to your toughest challenges.
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Disclaimer:This information is not designed to replace medical or psychological care. My remarks are based on over forty-five years of study, training, personal experience, and professional service. Extensive clinical, scientific, and empirical evidence supports much, but not all, of what I say. My current best understandings may change over time. I do not claim to have all the answers or the only answers. My hope is that this information assists you to consider what makes the most sense to you.